Numb
by doublemetalaxis
Summary: Arthur Kirkland is dying of a disease. Alfred Jones's heart gets just a little closer to breaking beyond repair every day. Songfic. Another year-old wonder from my Quotev T for character death.


_**Heyyyyeyyyyy! Ok so this is my sad fic. This is what happens when I listen to Linkin Park at 3AM haha~ anyway, whoever knows where I got the plot for the ending from should leave it in a review and then they get cupcakes! :D**_

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_**Numb - USUK**_

_Can't you see that you're smothering me,_

_Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control?_

_'Cause everything that you thought I would be_

_Has fallen apart right in front of you._

_(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)_

_Every step that I take is another mistake to you._

_(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)_

_And every second I waste is more than I can take._

Boston- 1765

Kirkland Residence, 7:00 P.M.

"I just can't do anything right, can I? You always want me to be like your little soldier! I'm just a pawn!"

"If you were just a pawn, you'd be doing everything right like you should! Besides, you are a soldier! You should follow your orders! You're so useless!"

"I hate you! I hate all of this! I just want to go home!"

"Fine. Go. Be a pathetic little weakling. I don't care."

"Fine."

With those words, Alfred turned and walked out the door. He was never meant for running. He got tired just running short sprints. But there was something so wonderful about it… He easily sprinted four blocks before slowing to a jog. Why was Arthur being like this? He hated it. So he left.

_I've become so numb, I can't feel you there,_

_Become so tired, so much more aware_

_I'm becoming this, all I want to do_

_Is be more like me and be less like you._

London- 2012

Home of Arthur Kirkland, 6:45 A.M.

He didn't know why it stung so badly. Sure he was sick, but that wasn't bothering him. It had been over 200 years, damn it, so why couldn't he move on? He couldn't go to work. He didn't even want to get up. Not today. Today was the anniversary of the day that Alfred had left him to become independent. And it was all because of him.

Same time, Long Island, New York

Alfred loved watching the ocean. He loved to watch the boats and the tourists at the Statue of Liberty, but what he really loved was to look at the sea on days like this, when no one was there. The ocean was gray and choppy, and the sky was much the same color. It wasn't raining, but it kept getting colder and colder. The small beach wasn't exactly the cleanest, either. But it was special. After all, it was from this beach that he could look out over the Atlantic Ocean and wonder what Arthur was doing. He got up off the sand, and went back to his car. He had packing to do.

_And I know_

_I may end up failing too._

_But I know_

_You were just like me with someone disappointed in you._

The next day-

London, England

Just outside Arthur Kirkland's house

Alfred was standing on the doorstep, just having rung the doorbell. He briefly wondered if Arthur would answer him. Then he remembered he had a better chance, as yesterday had ended and today had begun. Why couldn't Arthur just move on? The door opened to reveal a certain Englishman whom Alfred had been seeking. He looked worse today. Alfred's heart made another step towards breaking beyond repair. "Is it really you?" Arthur asked, seeming not to believe. "Yes." That was all the reply given before Arthur was pulled into a tight hug. "Let's go inside." Arthur suggested. Alfred followed him into the house. "I wanted to see you so badly." Arthur began laughing. Alfred supposed he should have been happy to finally see Arthur smile, but… This was different. This wasn't how laughter was supposed to sound. It wasn't happy, it was broken, cruel, insane. "What's so funny?" "Me. I'm just dreaming, aren't I? We're all such pathetic doomed creatures, aren't we?" Arthur said before he started laughing again. Now he sounded sad, like he would have cried if he had any tears left. "You need to eat something. Take a few sips of water. It's not a dream… You're not going to last much longer if you don't eat or drink. It doesn't matter that you're a country! If you think you can just wake up and it'll all be a dream and you'll be normal again with me next to you, think again! If this keeps up… The next time you dream, you'll never wake up." Alfred was close to tears and almost screaming at Arthur by this point. He didn't care what it took… Arthur had to heal. At least his emotions had to heal… Because they both knew his body never would.

Alfred made tea, Arthur being to weak and tired to stand for very long. When Alfred emerged from the kitchen holding two steaming cups of tea, Arthur was sitting on the couch, expressionless. It was starting to get dark. _No fair, _thought Alfred. _It can't get dark. I don't want to lose him yet. _Seconds passed. Minutes, hours. Finally, Arthur leaned over onto Alfred's shoulder. "Let's go to sleep." His voice, so quiet, nearly tore Alfred's heart completely into pieces.

After carrying Arthur to bed, Alfred climbed in next to him. "Will you sing for me?" Arthur asked. Both of them knew exactly why.

Alfred had never been much of a singer. He had some good ones, yes, but he himself never sang much. He picked a song he deemed appropriate and began to sing, ignoring the tears forming at the corners of his eyes.

_I see trees of green... red roses too_

_I see em bloom... for me and for you_

_And I think to myself... what a wonderful world._

_I see skies of blue... clouds of white_

_Bright blessed days...dark sacred nights_

_And I think to myself ...what a wonderful world._

_The colors of a rainbow...so pretty ..in the sky_

_Are also on the faces...of people ..going by_

_I see friends shaking hands...sayin.. how do you do_

_They're really sayin...i love you._

_I hear babies cry... I watch them grow_

_They'll learn much more...than I'll never know_

_And I think to myself ...what a wonderful world_

_The colors of a rainbow...so pretty ..in the sky_

_Are there on the faces...of people ..going by_

_I see friends shaking hands...sayin.. how do you do_

_They're really sayin...*spoken*(I ...love...you)._

_I hear babies cry... I watch them grow_

_And I think to myself ...what a wonderful world_

_Yes I think to myself ...what a wonderful world._

When he finished, he noticed that Arthur was crying too. The last comforts of his life were being given to him as they sat there, huddled in blankets in the darkness. Alfred leaned down and kissed Arthur on the forehead. "Don't ever leave me." Arthur pleaded, his ghost of a voice beginning to break with the tears. "Never." Alfred kissed Arthur's forehead, and they sank into a deep sleep.

The next day-

Arthur Kirkland's bedroom, 6:57 A.M.

Alfred awoke to silence and cold. Looking to Arthur's side of the bed, he noticed pale rose petals strewn everywhere, seeming to lead out the door and down the hall. He knew what had happened. Arthur- his guardian, co-worker, friend, lover- was gone. The British Empire, England, the U.K.- They would be gone with him, too. Following some childish hope, he followed the petals. Roses had always been Arthur's favorite flower… Suddenly, he heard a sound. It was one he knew well, the sound of a tea kettle starting to boil. Arthur walked out of the kitchen, smiling, holding the kettle in one hand and a cup in the other. "Good morning, dear. Did you sleep well?" Arthur asked casually, as though nothing had happened. He was greeted with a passionate kiss from Alfred. Alfred's heart had finished breaking. It was an unrecognizable pile of sand and rocks, hardened, broken, and eroded until it was unfixable. Still… If life was going to play such cruel games with him, he might as well play along. He pulled away from the kiss, smiling.

What a wonderful world, indeed.

_I've become so numb, I can't feel you there._

_(I'm tired of being what you want me to be)_

_I've become so numb, I can't feel you there._

_(I'm tired of being what you want me to be)_

_Lyrics for What a Wonderful World from _

_Lyrics for Numb from _


End file.
